Because Then I Would Be Enough
“Because then I would be enough.”
These are the words of Jim Carrey – presenting at the Golden Globes – making fun of himself and the whole spectacle that is celebrity award shows…
He said, “And when I dream, I don’t just dream any old dream. No sir. I dream about being three-time Golden Globe winning actor Jim Carrey. Because then I would be enough. It would finally be true. And I could stop this terrible search… for what I know ultimately won’t fulfill me.”
This, in my opinion is Carrey at his best. Pure comedic genius. His timing, his carefully chosen words… perfect. And hilarious.
But also, poignant. Challenging. Truth-telling.
This terrible search to be enough is one that we all know well.
I know it well.
I’ve explored this idea before – asking the question is it possible to do great things without becoming Darth Vader?
And I’ve wrestled some with these forces of ego, ambition, and holy calling. Can they work together for good?
Beloved African-American poet Langston Hughes describes the terrible search to be enough in this beautiful poem “Down Where I Am”
Too many years
Beatin’ at the door —
I done beat my
Both fists sore.
Too many years
Tryin’ to get up there —
Done broke my ankles down,
Got nowhere.
Too many years
Climbin’ that hill,
‘Bout out of breath.
I got my fill.
I’m gonna plant my feet
On solid ground.
If you want to see me,
Come down.
I am a husband, father, pastor, leader & reader. I love God, love people & love life.
Thank you for this. I needed it today. All my life I’ve literally been told by those closest to me that I wasn’t enough and I never would be. The words weren’t always that direct, but sometimes they were. I’ve lived all my life trying to be worthy in the eyes of the people closest to me and always feeling like I was failing miserably. And if I wasn’t good enough or worthy enough of their love, how could I be in God’s eyes? Its been a long process and a slow one with a lot of “one step forward, 2 steps back”, but I’m finally learning that I AM enough and worthy. But still, every now and then, more often than not, it’s good to have a reminder like this. So, thank you.
We love you Anna!
Hi Anna
I grew up in a household where I was told I was ugly, lazy and overly emotional. That I wasn’t enough. Eventually I realized the people telling me this were definitely not enough. Not kind enough. Not wise enough. I decided to learn a different way to think about myself. Now, some years later, I have happiness and contentment beyond what I could have imagined as a misunderstood teenager. Be encouraged on your journey – others have been on the path before you and it is possible to get where you want to go.