Brian Dolleman's Blog

This is some old gold… a repost from July 8, 2008 –
“The Importance of Having a Sense of Humor & Being Serious.”

Some people take themselves too seriously and need to lighten up.

Others don’t seem to have the ability to focus and get serious.

The truth is, we need both: we need to have a great sense of humor and we need to be seriously focused.

“For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven… a time to cry and a time to laugh; a time to grieve and a time to dance.” (Ecclesiastes 3.1, 4)

A LIGHT HEART

We, of all people, should be full of joy and fun to be around!

We’ve had our sins washed away, our destiny is secured for eternity, we have God’s Spirit in us, we’ve been given an inheritance, we have hope and we have purpose!

We have no reason to take ourselves seriously – it’s God who has made our lives good.

We should be able to laugh at ourselves and laugh with others.

FOCUSED & UNWAVERING

We should be the most focused, unwavering, determined people on the planet!

We are not confused, lost, hopeless or dismayed. We know who we are and we know what we’re here for.

We “fix our eyes” and “press on towards the goal to receive the prize.”

The kingdom is no joke to us – it is our passion and our life.

When we take the “wrong” things seriously…
We become no fun – we are religious, uptight, grumpy, judgmental, mean, policemen, bossy, small-minded and bound in tradition.

When we take the “right” things lightly…
We become worldly – slaves to our flesh, sense-oriented, undisciplined, ungodly, ineffective, hard-hearted and a bad testimony for Christianity.

Have a great sense of humor about…
Yourself, your agenda & plans, and people “stuff”.

Be serious, focused and unwavering about…
Helping others, advancing the kingdom, and God “stuff”.

Original + Copy

Act + Naturally

Meteoric + Rise

Non-Dairy + Creamer

Wireless + Cable

Fantasy + Football

Unforgiving + Christian

Boring + Church

Rumors are starting to leak out…

There’s a party happening this Sunday.

The Cha-Cha Slide.

BBQ

Cotton Candy.

Car & bike show.

Big inflatables for the kids.

Seahawks game.

Giveaways.

Happy older brothers & sisters.

Younger brothers & sisters returning home.

Let’s celebrate!

“So the party began…”

Live music. A feast. Dancing. Celebrating.

When his prodigal son came home, the Father said, “We must celebrate.”

It must have been some party.

As the older brother approached the house, he could hear music and dancing.

When I read this part of the prodigal son story, I’m convinced that we (the church) don’t really know how to celebrate.

I’ll just own it: I don’t really know how to celebrate.

I don’t know how to party.

I don’t know how to dance.

Maybe the only part I know is how to eat (Christians are good at eating).

Why are we such awkward partyers?

Why am I such an awkward partyer?

I don’t know the answer(s) but I know I don’t want to be so stiff and stuffy.

I don’t want the church to be stiff and stuffy.

I’m on a journey – the journey of discovering how to celebrate.

So let the journey begin…

So let the party begin!

A man had two sons…

The younger son took an early inheritance, broke all the rules, left his family behind and made a big mess of his life. Humbled and broken, he came home looking for a minimum-wage job.

Instead, the Father received his wayward son – as his son.

The younger son’s dignity was restored. He was given authority. He was celebrated.

Meanwhile, the older son was flipping out.

He’s ticked.

He’s speaking in ALL CAPS.

The older son has been keeping score…

“All these years, I’ve done EVERYTHING you asked – I’ve SLAVED for you.”

“You NEVER EVEN LET ME HAVE ONE LITTLE PARTY with my friends.”

“This SON OF YOURS comes home and you are throwing the BIGGEST PARTY EVER for him!”

“Are you kidding me? This is like one of those parties on MTV’s My Super Sweet Sixteen.”

“How much money did this party cost anyway? WHAT A WASTE!”

“And did you see all those TATTOOS he has now?”

“I’m pretty sure he has some STD’s too.”

The older brother’s rant went on and on as he continued down his checklist / scorecard.

Here’s the deal: score-keeping always loses. Grace wins.

Don’t be on the score-keeping (losing) side of things.

Be on the grace (winning) side of things!

A man had two sons…

The Father wanted both sons to be happily at home: part of the family and personally invested in the future of their estate.

Both sons broke their Father’s heart.

The younger son broke his Father’s heart by leaving home, living foolishly – jeopardizing his own health and well-being.

The older son broke his Father’s heart by being selfish – a score-keeping, self-righteous jerk, unwilling to celebrate the return of his lost brother.

The Father responded with grace to both sons.

Grace really does change everything…

Grace takes tattered rags and gives royal robes.

Grace takes bare feet and gives them new shoes.

Grace speaks compassionately to the stubborn, angry, self-righteous score-keeper.

Grace invites the pouting child to come inside and celebrate.

Here’s the Good News:

Wherever you’re at, whatever you’ve done, whatever you’re struggling with… there’s grace for that!

Are you a prodigal, wayward son?

There’s grace for that.

Are you a grumpy older brother?

There’s grace for that.

Your Father wants you to be happily at home: part of the family and personally invested in the future of the estate.

A man had two sons…

The older brother stayed at home and “did everything his father asked.” The younger brother left home with an early inheritance, partied and lost everything (yeah, I’m talking about the story of the Prodigal Son).

Here’s some food for thought:

Perhaps the older brother made life miserable for the younger brother and provided the motivation for him to leave home.

Maybe the older brother’s stern, unhappy, self-righteous, all work / no play attitude pushed the younger brother to reach out for something more enjoyable.

In the two other “lost” parables Jesus gives in this same teaching (lost sheep, lost coin), a search is made for the lost things.

Here’s some more food for thought:

Perhaps it was the responsibility of the older brother to go searching for his younger brother…

Do you remember Cain’s response to God when asked “Where is your brother?”

He said to God, “What, am I my brother’s keeper?”

Hmmmm.

Yes.

You are.

That’s why God asked.

And maybe He’s asking us “older brothers” (those of us who have been in church for a long time) today, “where are your younger brothers and sisters?”

Perhaps we have made life miserable for the younger brothers in the church and provided them with the motivation to leave.

Maybe our stern, unhappy, self-righteous, all work / no play attitudes have pushed the younger brothers to reach out for something more enjoyable.

Maybe we are responsible.

Maybe we are our brother’s keepers.

C’mon older brothers!

Let’s get the Father’s heart for our younger brothers and sisters.

When the Father begged his son (the older brother) to come inside and celebrate, he told him: “Dear son, you have always stayed by me, and everything I have is yours.” (Luke 15.31).

It’s time for us older brothers to see ourselves as co-owners in our Father’s household…

God’s mission and agenda is our mission and agenda.

A man had two sons…

You know this as the story of the Prodigal Son.

Both sons struggled with “self-perceived status disorder.”

When the younger son (the prodigal) finally came home, he begged for a place in his father’s household as a servant. He perceived his status with his father as completely destroyed or severely diminished.

He had self-perceived status disorder.

He believed he was no longer worthy to have son-status and his goal was to be granted slave-status.

When the older son (the self-righteous one) flipped out over the celebration for his younger brother, he said to his father, “All these years I’ve slaved for you and never once refused to do a single thing you told me to – in all that time you never gave me even one feast with my friends.” (Luke 15.29).

He perceived his status with his father as that of a contractual employee or servant.

He had self-perceived status disorder.

He believed his his place in his father’s household was to “slave for you,” hopefully earning bonuses or recognition for all his hard work and compliance.

The father didn’t want servants or slaves.

He wanted sons.

The father clothed his younger son, put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. The threw a massive party celebrating the return of his son.

The father begged his older son to come in and celebrate with him. He said “Everything I have is yours.”

I think we all struggle with “self-perceived status disorder” from time to time.

Here’s a simple reminder: our Father doesn’t want servants or slaves – He wants sons and daughters.

“Because we are his children, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts… Now you are no longer a slave but God’s own child. And since you his child, God has made you his heir.” (Galatians 4.6, 7)

A man had two sons.

The younger son asked for an early inheritance and left home. He partied, made bad decisions and eventually came to the end of himself. Broke and starving, he decided to come home and beg for a “job” at his father’s estate as a servant.

The father had been watching and waiting for his son’s return. He ran to greet him.

The man ignored his son’s request for servant status and he immediately began restoring… (he restored family status, dignity, entrusted authority). Then he threw a huge party announcing/celebrating his son’s return.

The older son heard the sounds of celebration and asked what was happening. He was told about his brother’s return and the party their father was hosting.

The older son threw a fit and refused to come to the celebration.

His father came outside and begged him to come inside and participate.

The angry older son launched into a speech: “I’ve slaved for you all these years, doing everything you said perfectly. I never got even a little party in my honor… but this demon child of yours comes home broke, tattooed, disease-ridden and hung-over – and you throw the biggest party ever.”

The man showed grace to his older son saying “Everything I have is yours – come, let’s celebrate together.”

These two sons are also in the church today…

The older son is the long-time Christian, the rule follower who believes he has done everything the Father requires perfectly. He is prideful, arrogant and has a hard heart. He believes he deserves recognition for all his work.

The younger son is the new Christian, the rule breaker who believes he doesn’t deserve to be the Father’s child. He is broken, humbled and has a soft heart. He cannot believe his good fortune in getting what he clearly does not deserve.

The Father gives grace to both sons.

There is grace for the younger son – the rule breaker, the sinner, the foolish one.

And there is grace for the older son – the rule follower, the self-righteous, the foolish one.

Today we had our Great Big Backpack Giveaway. Honestly, I was kinda nervous – wondered if anyone would show up. We’ve never done anything quite like this before.

Our intent was to be a blessing to our community, to demonstrate God’s grace in a real way.

The giveaway was a huge success! Two hours before the event was scheduled to start, people started lining up. That line grew and grew. When it was finally time to start, I was worried we would run out of backpacks.

We did run out of backpacks – but all the kids who came got one.

500 backpacks given away. It took like 30 minutes.

I loved seeing the families hang out here on the church campus – having lunch, enjoying the inflatables… just having a good time.

Today we blessed people. We demonstrated God’s grace. We gave out 500 backpacks.

Victory. Success. Beautiful.

Grace changes everything. Yes it does!